Thanksgiving: where we all suddenly become victims of overestimating ourselves and believe that we can totally have more than one loaded plate of goodness when in reality, our appetites haven’t changed one bit. Or for me, an odd conglomerate of a lunch with minimal arguments had by my sister and I about procrastinating the cooking process. But more than anything, I do like that the holiday allows me the opportunity to reflect on what I’m thankful for.

These last couple of months have been more than enough reason to be thankful. I’ll probably get more in depth of what I’m thankful for in the past year once I’m celebrating the new year in New Delhi but I want to take the moment to reflect on how absolutely thankful I am.

I’ve gone on so many adventures and learned so much about myself along the way. I owe everything I’ve learned and become to the opportunities I’ve chased and all the people who have been by my side as I’ve come along. All the family and friends who have supported me have been so important in the last couple of years. I would have never dreamed of the type of year I’ve had and that even though it’s almost over there’s so many more adventures that await me for this remainder of 2015.

Adventures in Canada. 13 Days of shenanigans. Friends made. Accomplishments achieved. And so many more.

I’m honest to Lophi blessed to have gotten this far. Just two years ago I was struggling with the worst of my anxiety to the point it spiraled into a mild depression. I was just trying to get through every single hour, let alone day to day. Life was absolutely difficult to survive at that point. I wasn’t sure if the light at the end of the tunnel wasn’t just a train trying to knock me back even further. Everything I knew and everything I was had imploded upon itself and I was just trying to duck tape the pieces back together. I didn’t even realize I was trying to fix something that didn’t need to be fixed. My life was like a nebula. I had reached the point where it imploded but I was in the middle and couldn’t see the beautiful components that illuminated my life. And since that ultimate low point of depression, anxiety and self harm, I took the step back and saw the chance to appreciate the art around me.

I’m not cured. That’s not how mental illness works. We don’t get better just because someone tells us to or that our mind just decides to stop hating ourselves. I just had to pause and reevaluate my life to see that it wasn’t a waste and that some kind of adventure was awaiting me if I just took the time to breathe and challenge myself to live better.

I’m so thankful that I eventually got the roundhouse kick that knocked me back into check. If it wasn’t for falling, I would have never understood that I could end up even higher than before. I’m thankful that I was a fool because now I’m becoming someone worth being proud of at the end of each day. Life is about growing and I’m still doing it. But I’d be as foolish to admit that I wasn’t appreciating the journey so far. Happy Thanksgiving yall.