Sometimes after a hugely impacting weekend like the one I just had, it seems like going back to the life you temporarily escaped from is a completely different world. And just like an astronaut landing on some distance land unknown, sometimes you find yourself treading even more carefully because you haven’t figured out this new place. It’s pretty weird when you say this about the place that has been your home since August 2012.

This weekend was honestly everything I needed. Getting a breath of fresh air, away from everything I knew and just opening myself up to a brand new opportunity. I finally gained the clarity I’ve been aching to find. I have the strength to keep picking myself up even if some of my stressors Spartan kick me down and out for the count. It’s like I’ve regained my connection the home base and now I’m being guided along this new place with this extra knowledge and comfort of not doing it alone.

Was I surprised that I experienced every single one of my stressors again today? Nope. That just seems to be how the world has been working lately. But having my little reminder of strength had me still smiling and powering forward because I can’t give up this fight when there’s so much more than idiotic things that won’t matter come May?

Does it make my heart sad to know there are some people I truly care about just walking away? Immensely. But I can only do so much. I need to keep myself surrounded by those who care about me and remind me that I’m someone worth being. I will not be chasing people who don’t want to be followed. I won’t be going Weast when I need to go East. There’s no need to chase every sunset when each new day gives an opportunity to see the sun once more.

It’s going to be difficult as I regain my surroundings since I’m finally stabilizing. I’m not 100% okay but I’m okay with that idea. I can do things. I’m someone who can manage to do all these things. I don’t need to fight all the forces out of my control when there is so much out there I know I can take care of. And that begins with taking care of myself with guidance from my rock as I explore the unknown.

Some interesting adventure is right barely out of reach, I can feel it in my blood. All I need to do is take the step in the right direction.